True Happiness is Just the Beginning: A New Chapter of Life According to Adler

Introduction: What Happened to the Prince and Princess After That?

Countless fairy tales we read end with the sentence: “And they lived happily ever after.” But for those of us living in reality, this sentence always leaves behind questions. What specifically does that ‘happily ever after’ look like? Were there no conflicts? Was every day like a festival?

We tend to think of happiness as a kind of ‘ending credit.’ Like the saying “pleasure follows pain,” we think of it as a state of peaceful completion reached after enduring all the hardships. However, Alfred Adler presents a completely different perspective:

“The moment you decide to be happy, your true life has only just begun.”

Today, we will follow Adler’s guidance on why happiness is the starting line rather than the finish line, and how we can continue the new journey called ‘a happy life.‘

1. Happiness is a ‘Direction,’ Not a Settlement

In Adlerian psychology, happiness is not a fixed state. It is a dynamic vector—a direction.

Many people believe that if they achieve a specific goal, happiness will last forever. But human desires are endless, and environments always change. Happiness based on ‘having’ vanishes like a mirage the moment those possessions disappear or become familiar.

True happiness comes not from ‘where I have arrived’ but from where I am walking towards right now. Setting a direction to contribute to others, connect with the community, and become a better version of yourself than yesterday. The moment you take the first step in that direction, you are already standing at the center of happiness, and that step itself is happiness.

2. Discarding ‘Seriousness’ and Choosing ‘Earnestness’

To continue the journey of life, Adler suggests an interesting attitude: Do not take life too seriously.

Being serious means being weighed down by past wounds or future worries, failing to enjoy the ‘here and now.’ Living with a frown, thinking “Why is my life like this?” or “What if something goes wrong in the future?” is not the attitude of a happy traveler.

Instead, Adler emphasizes earnestness about the fleeting moment. Listening intently to the person in front of you now, and putting your heart into what you are doing now. It means being an actor who meticulously performs each scene of the great play called life, rather than turning it into a serious tragedy. When we discard seriousness, we can finally catch the light rhythm of life and continue the journey of happiness.

3. Continuous Re-selection: Happiness is Not the Inertia of Yesterday

The mistake we most often make is thinking that happiness is an asset that is maintained once acquired. However, Adler believed in the Creative Self of humans.

Even if you decided to be happy yesterday, your heart might feel heavy when you open your eyes this morning. That is a natural phenomenon. What’s needed at this time is ‘re-selection.’ Happiness is not an inertia that rolls automatically according to yesterday’s resolve. It is a proactive act of creation that must be declared newly every moment, every morning: “I choose to be happy again today.”

The phrase “true happiness is just the beginning” is also a message of blessing that we are given the opportunity to create a new life every day.

4. The Joy of Contribution: Fuel for the Journey

What is the fuel that prevents this long and beautiful journey from stopping? Adler called it the Feeling of contribution.

The feeling that I am helping someone, the conviction that I am a necessary being for the world, makes us grow again. No matter how much you possess, if you lack a sense of contribution, the journey of life soon becomes boring.

It doesn’t have to be a grand social contribution. We can gain a sense of contribution from a warm word to the person beside us or the attitude of doing our work faithfully. The subjective conviction that “I am useful to someone” becomes the most powerful energy that sustains our lives.

5. Conclusion: Now Write Your Own Story

Adler said that life is a “series of drawing dots.” The dots of the past have already been drawn and cannot be changed. But the dot you draw at this moment and the dots you will draw in the future are solely in your hands.

Do not wait any longer to be happy. The day when all conditions become perfect will never come. Instead, open the castle gates and walk out, declaring “I am happy” just as you are now, imperfect as it may be.

Beyond the castle gates, a vast world you haven’t imagined will unfold. Sometimes the wind and rain will blow and you will have to cross rugged mountains, but if you have ‘self-belief’ and ‘direction’ within you, all those landscapes will become precious scenes that fill your great epic.

True happiness is just the beginning. Why don’t you turn the first page of the book of your new life right now?

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